[CryptoButthead.com , msc, mschro, June 15, 2024] Hey there, folks! It’s been a while, but Ash and Booker are back in action. 😎📉
It’s like we’ve been trapped in a time warp of boredom for the last three months. We had a hunch this might happen – that the “Sell in May and Go Away” adage would rear its ugly head, and boy, were we right. The “Summer Lull” has settled in like a bad case of the Mondays. Markets are moving as if they’ve hit molasses, with volatility as exciting as watching grass grow. 💤🌱
The Dreaded Summer Lull
You know it’s bad when analysts crawl out from their hidey-holes, spouting predictions so absurd they sound like they were dreamed up during a tequila-fueled bender. It’s the same old story: “specialists” who couldn’t butter a slice of bread trying to tell us where the market is headed. 📉🤦♂️
NVidia: The Unchallenged AI Titan
One thing’s for sure: NVidia continues to be the undisputed leader in the AI tech scene. If you ask us, there isn’t a company on the horizon that can even come close to challenging their dominance. NVidia’s got the game on lock, and anyone who thinks otherwise is probably off their rocker. 💻👑
MicroStrategy’s Bitcoin Play
In the crypto world, MicroStrategy is Rock’n’Roll. They’re selling $500 million in convertible bonds, upping the ante to $700 million worth of notes – all to buy more Bitcoin. It’s like Michael Saylor is playing Monopoly, but instead of hotels, he’s snapping up every Bitcoin he can get his hands on. MicroStrategy plans to redeem $650 million of 2025 convertible notes and settle all conversion requests in shares. Bernstein even suggested Bitcoin could hit $1 million within ten years, giving MicroStrategy an outperform rating and a $2,890 price target. 💰📈
Tesla: Moving to Texas and Facing the Critics
Tesla shareholders have spoken, and the company is moving its headquarters to Texas. Naturally, the haters are having a field day, predicting Tesla’s stock will tank by more than half. It’s like they’ve got a personal vendetta against Elon Musk. Seriously, what’s wrong with our country when visionaries like Musk are constantly under fire? 🌵🚗
We get it – Musk isn’t your average CEO. He doesn’t play by the rules, but that’s precisely what makes him a genius. The naysayers just can’t seem to grasp that. Cathie Wood from ARK Invest gets it though; she’s pegged Tesla’s 2029 share value at $2,600. We’re with her on this one. CNBC and its ilk can keep underestimating Tesla, focusing solely on its EV production while ignoring game-changers like Optimus and FSD. One of these days, Tesla will break out, and we’ll be here for it. 🚀📈
The Crypto Conundrum: BTC and ETH Stuck in the Mud
As for Bitcoin, it’s been stuck in a lackluster price channel, fluctuating between $65,000 and $71,000. It’s like waiting for paint to dry, just without the fumes. The advent of ETFs and big players like Blackrock getting involved has thrown a wrench in the works. Ethereum isn’t faring much better, unable to break free from Bitcoin’s gravitational pull. Currently, BTC is at $66,144, and ETH is languishing at $3,538. It’s a snooze fest, folks. 🥱💤
Our Strategy: Cash is King
This tedium is why we’ve taken a step back from writing about market movements – there’s just not much excitement to report. With it being an election year, we expect things to heat up towards the end, but for now, the “Summer Lull” is in full effect. We’ve moved 60% of our portfolio into cash, just biding our time for a significant trend to emerge. 📊💸
So, there you have it, folks. That’s the lowdown from us. We’re riding out the lull and ready for whatever comes next. Have a fantastic weekend, and stay tuned for more updates.
Peace out, yo! ✌️🎤
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